After spending the ten years of my life building a career in fashion with a diverse range of projects from publishing, retail, photography, and creative direction, I lived in Vancouver, New York, and have now settled in Los Angeles. Over the past 4-5 years, I was increasingly feeling like something was wrong. On paper everything was perfect, career opportunity, beautiful apartment, good money, creative work with bigger and bigger clients. But I was also breaking down physically, finding myself increasingly isolated, lonely, unhappy and depressed.


I never imagined that I would be dealing with depression. I came from a great family, and I thought I’d always been in control of my life. I was doing what I was supposed to be doing until I couldn’t anymore. After thousands of dollars spent on supplements, tests, naturopaths, meditation retreats, vacations and no sign of things turning around, I felt there had to be something deeper I needed to look into. I decided to leave New York in September 2017 and jumped head first ‘into the well.’ This website is a place for me to share my experiences, the people, and the tools that have guided me along the way and the areas that continue to provide inspiration and growth. The past two years have transformed my life entirely, in the best way and I am grateful to the pain teachers who have provided me with some challenging lessons.


Everyone is on their own journey, but we often could use some help. Whether it’s in waking up, attaining personal freedom, finding peace with ourselves, or just feeling a little bit better—there is no right or wrong way, and we can learn deeply from each of our experiences. I am hopeful that sharing some of mine will help others to see and feel in a new way.


Ryan Willms



I’m currently based in Los Angeles and working as a freelance creative director and recently became a Level 2 certified Holistic Life Coach through the C.H.E.K. Institute.